Are you caught in the “Healers Trap” and don’t even know it?

What exactly is “the healers trap”?  It is a phrase I coined after years of working as a “healer” and working with hundreds of other “healers” at the school.  If we have the answers and can heal others, why do we still feel we need healing?  The trap is that once you start, you do not stop.  You constantly feel the need to learn more, do more, give more and be more.  There is no stillness.  There is a compulsion for movement and growth.   Here lies the problem.  Without firm and solid roots, you cannot grow strong and stable.

You are blades of grass in a field instead of the strong tree.  Grass is beautiful and very important.  What happens to it though?  It is small compared to the tree.  It gets cut down when somebody thinks it is grown too high.  Most do not cut down a big strong tree; instead they find shade, beauty and comfort in it.  One blade of grass in the field looks lonely and like it is going to die.  A tree in a field looks like a survivor and a place for others to rest.  One blade of grass in a field of grass gets lost and although feels like it is one with the field, we all strive for acceptance of our individuality.  Tree or grass?  Do you want to be a tree but are planting grass seeds instead? 

How can you tell if you are in a Healers Trap?

Do you sometimes get tired after a healing?  Giving away your energy.

Has anybody ever cancelled a meeting and you are a bit relieved? Should have said no to the session to begin with and needed rest.

Do you ask the person how it was?  Poor confidence and self-doubt.

Do you suffer from poor self-esteem? If you think you are not meeting expectations all the time, poor self esteem is natural.

Are you shy? Insecurities

Have you been ridiculed by others for your healing beliefs? Cuts you down.

Have you felt so hurt by some and their reaction to your healing beliefs that you have started to avoid them or consider them energy drainers?  You are giving your energy away.  They cannot take what you do not give.

Do you have more than one healing modality training?  There has not been one that seems to work for everybody all the time.  Including you!

Are you longing for more?  You are not full.

Do you know you are connected to the Oneness of the universe,  all but still at times feel alone? There is still a feeling of separation, but not sure from what.

Suffer from anxiety?  We all feel anxious when we feel alone and unwanted.

Suffer from depression?  Who would not get depressed feeling this way?

Feel guilty and responsible for others even when you know you are not responsible? Undue pressure on yourself.

Do you think about your mistakes over and over again?  Compulsive negativity towards self.

Do you let other’s words hurt you for hours, days or even years after? Inability to let go.

Are you tired a lot of the time?  Adrenal glands always on.

Do you suffer muscle pain? The heart is being ignored and unheard.

Do you have a hard time falling asleep at night?  Mind controls you and you cannot stop thinking.

Do you crave sugar?  Your body is desperate to feel good so sugar releases chemicals in the brain that make you feel good, and it is worth the crash after you feel.  

Are you surprised you can relate with this list?  The question is now what you do with this knowledge?   How can you heal others when it is breaking you?  You can sit here and read this and feel that you feel these things sometimes but you have been trained and love giving to others.  Of coarse you do not suffer from this, there must be a mistake.  There is.  Just one.

You don’t have to hurt to heal.

Trust me, I understand.  I have been searching for a long time.  I was in this Healers Trap and am so grateful that I have just found my way out of the labyrinth.  Don’t believe me that I suffered from it?  I am going to list my certificates and training.  Angel Medium, Past Life Healer, Quantum Hypnotherapist, Qi Gong Practitioner, Akashic Record Healer, Colour Therapist,  Crystaline Angel Healer, Delegate of the Light, Advanced Angel Practitioner,  Chakra Healer, Trance Healer, Psychic Medium and there are more.  I forget them.  That is sad.  I forget what I thought would be the answer.  How does that happen?  I was left hungry.

I am now full.  I have ended my search after training for three years and will never pick up another training manual or take a class that starves me more.  If you were hungry and somebody offered you a plate of food but said you will be full for 5 minutes but will be hungrier after… would you take out your fork?   I have found peace.   I have found it and so excited about it that I want to share it with you all and have taken amazing steps to do this.  If you find yourself connecting with this blog and want to feel full and complete, stay tuned.  I am going to offer to help.  I am going to share my plate because it is never ending.

What if you could do what you love by helping people and not get tired, hurt, made fun of, have 100% success rate, feel safe and secure, feel happy, get rid of anxiety and depression, sleep well at night, lose weight not gain it, and feel a true place of acceptance and peace?  What if you could give it to yourself? 

Stay tuned.  More details to come. 

Namaste,

My Zen Master’s (Nissim Amon) view on dealing with Accumulating Emotions.

I am happy to share with you that my Trilotherapy teacher finally has an English speaking Facebook page.  My Hebrew sucks!!  Ok it is non-existent.  His words are wise and are touching. 

Sometimes the inner situation is bad and the mind looks outwards to find answers in the spiritual world. I saw this in many monasteries, young men carrying a great pain who sentenced themselves to extended periods of silence and prolonged sitting during meditation. The mind took emotion into a social solitary confinement and searched hidden worlds, with the ambition that one day the great enlightenment will come the pain would immediately be erased.

With adherence to the spiritual practice and discipline, the mind develops a "spiritual ego". This is due to the persistence and moving up in the ranks of the spiritual journey. For emotion, this situation is misleading. Seemingly, the mind and emotion are on a spiritual journey, the "purest" journey that one can make. The mind speaks beautiful words on sacred values, but utilizing its spiritual excuses, the mind convinces emotion to give up on anger or sadness, crying or enjoyment, and forces emotion to be constantly forgiving and full of compassion. I have seen monks proud of their self-imposed suppression, restricting themselves of all forms of sexuality, eating little, sleeping on a hard floor, waking in the middle of the night for an additional practice session, certain that they are the elites of the group. This kind of mind ignores the anger and pain that is in emotion. No process of cleansing and release of accumulated emotions is undertaken. They spoke with nobody about their pain, didn't cry, receive hugs, and there are monasteries that allow their students to be tough on themselves.

I have also met the spiritual types who live the normal city life, who, in the name of compassion, mind enforces restraint upon emotion and the acceptance of bad treatment at work or in a relationship, things which are not good for emotion. The mind will claim that the happiness is internal and does not need to be searched out through external change, nor is there a need to hang lack of joy upon others.

One's inner distress is not solved in the monastery, the middle does not really lead, there is no inner balance, and often there is a hidden depression in emotion. The mind is occupied with the chase after more and more spiritual knowledge, as well as the continuous search for methods, theories and teachers. The spirituals mind's technique of control is misleading and confusing. In addition to reducing the importance of emotion, the mind blames emotion for all slips along the way.

All this is done in order that full recognition for the intense efforts of the mind will reach the yearned for enlightenment, just out of the blue. There is a joke about a man walking down the street, when all of a sudden, a penguin fell on him from the sky. He asked a passerby what to do, and the passerby proposed that he take it to the zoo. The next day the passerby saw him with the penguin again. "I thought you took it to the zoo?" He said. "I did", answered the man, "but today he wants to go see a movie".

Enlightenment is not a penguin that falls suddenly from the skies. You cannot be tough, critical, blame, restrict and suppress yourself, then hope that you receive a prize for it. In the Trilotherapy journey, the ratio is changed between the mind and emotion, illuminating the middle way and understanding that the solution to the riddle of inner happiness is not hidden behind the spiritual ideas of the mind.

The moment that you become considerate and forgiving towards yourself, allow yourself to be sad and to talk about it, allow yourself to cry if it feels right, to have fun, to open up to people; if you decide to love yourself and to rest occasionally in the space that is between your thoughts, the yearned for enlightenment is not quite so distant.

Please feel free like Nissim’s Facebook page and continue the wisdom of Zen.

Namaste,