If you saw this sad puppy dog, you would want to rush right up to it, give it a big hug and ask it “What’s the matter baby?” You would want to know why it was sad and want to embrace it and love it even more because it was sad. You would want to pet it on its head and tell it everything was all right and try to make it better. When the dog would appreciate your help and lick your face and start to feel better, you would let the dog give you love and you would enjoy it.
Why then when you are sad do you think you deserve to be ignored, even kicked and turn away the love others offer you to try to help? Do you treat a dog’s sadness better than you would treat your own?
Why do we hate sadness so much? Why do you look at your sadness as a failure? What part of you said that you had to be happy all the time? Have you created a negative relationship with sadness? What if you could learn to use sadness as a messenger of joy? Think of it; when you are sad people ask you why you are sad so they can help. If you are not asking yourself why you are sad and just sitting in the sadness, you cannot help yourself either. Sadness can create movement. Sadness says to your body, mind and soul that it needs attention and something has to change. When you address the sadness, you can make changes and bring in more joy. In order to bring in the joy you have to make room for it by letting go of the sadness. First step in doing this is finding out what the sadness needs to not be forced out, but to leave with a smile on its face. Sadness will not go away if you do not give it what it wants. Do you know what all sadness wants? It wants you to be happy. How ironic is that? You are sad because you were ignoring your right and need to be happy. Ignoring it more does not seem like the right way to handle it. Lets look at benefits of being sad.
In an article in Science News, Magazine Of The Society For Science & The Public, its author Bruce Bower links sadness with the important cycle of problem solving. Think of it as an important link in the evolution of change. He quotes another study where periods of sadness allowed for detail-oriented, and analytical thinking style and that sadness was an early warning signs of problems or even dangerous situations. I don’t know about you but I do not want to get rid of a warning signal my spirit has to help me be happy.
Did you know when you are sad you are more detail orientated, have better recall and are more fair to others with less likely hood to judge them? Now remember that sadness is different from anger or apathy.
Most people get sad for one reason I find; they believe their ability to give and receive love has been jeopardized. It means you can get to the real details of the events that make you sad, and address it to make the necessary changes to feel and give love.
Let’s talk to your sadness instead of ignoring it. What should you be asking your sadness? Just think back to that little puppy dogface at the beginning of this article. What did you want to ask the little guy?
- What made you sad? Don’t know? When did you start feeling the right to give and receive love was jeopardized?
- Know where you saw or experienced this feeling. Really look into it.
- Ask how this person or thing impacted your life?
- Do not fill in the blanks if you do not know the answers. Your best bet is to ask the person to fill in the blanks. Do not create what is not there.
- Take a look at where you can do better at getting what you really want. Where could you work harder at being happier?
Knowing why you are sad can actually make you happy! If you are worried about how sad you are, please talk to your doctor about it. There are many chemical reasons why people may need some assistance. There is no shame in needing help to retrain your brain to produce the chemicals it needs to be happy.
Did you know that it is physically impossible to be happy if your mind does not produce the right chemicals? You owe it to yourself to talk to some people to help you. Talk to a doctor or natural path, or even a friend. Do not handle sadness alone. Embrace it. Thank it for showing it to help you be happier. It can be your friend.
Namaste,
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